The physical healing is what usually takes center stage after birth but the emotional highs and lows, navigating feeding, took a significant toll on my mental health. It took me time to recover physically, I’m navigating the complexities of postpartum mentally. Throughout this journey, I have come up with some tips that might be helpful for you when going through postpartum.
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Acknowledgment and Self-Love
The first few days, I experienced emotions from extreme happiness, joy, exhaustion to loneliness and anxiety. I’ve learned that it’s important to allow yourself to feel these emotions. I realized I was bottling up my feelings and festered until it caused me even more stress and pressure. I was able to work through these emotions by talking to a therapist and my partner. I kept telling myself that no one is perfect and understand that I am doing the best I can.
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Rest When You Can
Sleep when the baby is sleeping. Has anyone heard that one before? Well, this is not easy to do, especially if you need to pump, clean, eat, shower, or just sit for a few seconds in peace. However, rest is essential for both physical and mental recovery. I was able to get help with household chores and my partner was able to watch the baby so I could get some rest even if it was a short nap. Naps helped me clear my head and recharge for the next few hours.
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Seek Support
I realized after the first few days alone, that I needed support. My mom was able to give me moral support and help take care of baby and me. However, I also needed a support system of new mothers that are going through similar experiences. I joined a postpartum support group and learned invaluable tips and made friends along the way. Connecting with other mothers also helped get rid of the isolating feeling and gave me validation.
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Find Moments for Self-care
Self-care is often the last thing on your mind when you have a newborn. However, even small acts of self-care, like eating a meal in peace, reading a book, going for a short walk, or taking a short nap can have a positive impact on your mental health.
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Stay Connected with Your Partner
Maintaining communication with my partner was essential. At this time, both of us were adjusting to new roles and trying to work through sleep deprivation. We attempted to check in with each other at least one time a day to assess what worked well for the day and what we need to work on for the next day. We tried to share our feelings to ensure we do not develop resentment towards each other.
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Take Things One Day at a Time
Adjusting to parenthood is difficult, and in the early days a routine is not possible. It was hard for me to adjust, especially when I am used to a set schedule every day. I had to remind myself that we do not have to do everything perfectly from the start and tried to just take one day at a time and be present in each moment I could. Being present allowed me a new opportunity to bond with my baby.
Being aware of my mental state daily during the newborn months and seeking support allowed me to be present with my baby and enjoy the short amount of time we get together before heading back to work.
